


chasing hearts

by anothermisreadlullaby



Category: Of Mice & Men (Band), Sleeping With Sirens
Genre: AU, Gay, M/M, Slash, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-29
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-04-01 21:55:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4035967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anothermisreadlullaby/pseuds/anothermisreadlullaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Kellin and his mother move to New York after the divorce, he's shocked when he actually finds himself intrugued by the shy, kind, red-headed boy next door.</p>
<p>But that doesn't mean he likes him.</p>
<p>Of course not.</p>
<p>He's just a little lonely and he appreciates the attention.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i'm the one that's always leaving you

**Author's Note:**

> this is an old fic i was working on about two years ago but never got around to updating. but i'm back at it again!! i've posted this on wattpad and mibba, as well as here. stay with me, the next chapter will be up soon!!!!

Kellin was quiet as he watched the road pass by quickly with the speed of the car. Silent tears made their way down his pale cheeks, but he made no attempt to rid them away. The awful stench of fertilizer filled his nostrils as the window on his mother's side of the car slid down.

He didn't understand. His mom had figured it'd be best to move out of state, especially once the divorce between his parents was finalized, but he didn't see the point in moving all the way to New York. He was perfectly content back in Michigan.

"It's going to be okay, baby."

His mother's voice startled him from his thoughts. She quickly cast a comforting glance his way, before focusing back on the road. "I know how you feel, Kellin. You think I don't, but I do. It'll be scary at first, but I know you'll grow to like New York."

"How do _you_ know?" he spat, the words leaving his mouth before he could think about them, "You just expect me to be a-okay with the fact that you just pack up our shit and move us all the way to New York? Do you not understand what this will do to me? I was fucking _happy_ in Michigan, and the problems you and Dad seem to have shouldn't have to ruin that!"

"Kellin Quinn Bostwick, watch your language!" his mother snapped, sending him a sharp glare, "This is for the best! Your father and I were having issues that were not healthy for this family! I'm sorry you don't get it, but you're not the only one hurting, Kellin!"

Kellin just rolled his eyes, shoving the earphones to his iPod in his ears. He blasted the volume as loud as it could get, the lyrics to a song by Copeland taking place of all noise. He leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes in an attempt to relax. He already had a weird feeling building in his stomach.

 

Kellin stirred in his sleep at the sound of voices outside the car. He recognized one of the voices as his mother's, while the other voice was unfamiliar, but clearly that of a young male.

"Is that your son?" the unknown voice asked quietly.

"Yes, he fell asleep on the way. He's pretty shaken up about the move. He's lived in Michigan his entire life," he faintly heard his mom respond.

"Understandable. I'd probably be upset, too. It's got to be tough, leaving everything you knew behind," the male sighed, and Kellin could've sworn there was a hint of sadness in his tone, but it could've just been the remaining feeling of fatigue talking, "If you'd like, I can show him around when he wakes up. Summer break just started a few days ago, so he won't need to worry about school just yet."

"Oh, that would be lovely. Thank you, dear."

"Oh, no, ma'am, it's really not a problem. Do you want any help with your things?"

"If you would, please. Or you could try to wake my son up. He'd probably chew my head off if I tried."

A soft, not-so-girly giggle came after that, but no words. Kellin could hear the click of his mom's heels against the concrete, before the creak of a door opening. He jumped violently when he felt a gentle touch against his shoulder, one he hadn't been expecting. His eyes snapped open, only to make direct contact with wide, curious brown eyes and a mop of fiery orange hair.

"Whoa, man, are you okay?" the boy in front of him asked, hesitantly bringing his hand back to his side, "I'm sorry if I scared you. Your mom just said -"

"It's okay," Kellin chuckled, lifting his fists to rub at his eyes. He tugged his earphones out of his ears, suddenly noticing the lack of lyrics in his ears. He attempted to unlock his iPod, sighing when he realized that it had died. He moved to unbuckle his seatbelt, looking up at the other boy with a strained smile.

The other boy nodded and bit his lip, stepping back and holding the car door open so Kellin could slide out. After Kellin was standing safely on the sidewalk, the redhead shut the door for him quickly.

"If you want, I can help you out with whatever stuff you have to carry in," the boy said quietly, not looking back up at Kellin.

"Yeah, sure," Kellin mumbled, walking around to open the trunk, though not that interested. He appreciated the other's offer, really, it was kind of him. Kellin still wasn't the slightest bit happy about the whole situation, though, and it made it hard for him to think happy about anything, no matter how kind certain strangers may have been. The redhead followed Kellin's example as he grabbed a few bags from the trunk. "So, um, I'm Alan, by the way. I live right over there," he pointed to the small house directly to the left of Kellin's new home.

"Kellin. It's nice to meet you, Alan," Kellin replied politely, not bothering to smile at the other as he led him up the path to the house.

"Likewise, Kellin," Alan blushed, not at all put off by the other's behavior.

When the boys stepped inside, Kellin's mom was already in the front room. She had the biggest smile he'd ever seen her wear, making it difficult for him to stay angry for very long. Difficult, but not impossible.

"Oh, boys, isn't this place just lovely?" she gushed, genuinely happy, "Justin and Jesse should be by with the moving truck tomorrow with the rest of our things. They wanted to help us settle in, isn't that sweet? I've always liked those boys. Kellin, I haven't picked a room yet, because I wanted you to choose first. Go on, boys, tell me what you think!"

With that, Kellin's mother ushered them toward the stairs. Kellin shook his head, moving the straps of the bags he carried into his left hand.

He used his right hand to grip Alan's forearm, pulling him carefully upstairs.

"Your mom is crazy," Alan laughed, allowing the dark-haired boy to pull him along.

Kellin just forced a smile at Alan, releasing his arm and walking down the length of the hall, examining each room.

There were two bedrooms, which were both decent in size. One room was slightly larger than the other, but not by much. The first room had it's own bathroom, a small closet and enough room to fit a full-sized bed, dresser, radio, computer desk, and pretty much anything else you might find in the average teenager's bedroom. The second room was about the same size, with a slightly larger closet and no connected bathroom. The living room, kitchen, dining room, a few storage closets, and the other bathroom were located on the first floor, as you would normally expect.

Kellin decided to choose the second bedroom, simply because he believed that his mom should have the best one. Just because he was angry with her didn't mean he didn't want her to have nice things.

With Alan hot on his trail, Kellin entered his new room and carelessly dumped his bags onto the floor. Alan bit his lip nervously and set the things he was carrying down onto the floor with more caution than Kellin had.

Kellin sighed heavily, running his hand through his dark hair and slumping against the wall nearest to him. He reached into his pocket, pausing to look up a Alan for a moment.

"Hey, close the door and open the window, will ya?"

Alan stumbled over his words for a moment before uttering out an "Um, okay," and complying. Once the door was shut and the window was raised, a cigarette was immediately poised between Kellin's lips and he fumbled with a bright green lighter, huffing in frustration when the flame wouldn't catch.

"Here, let me," Alan spoke, walking to Kellin and taking the lighter in his hands. He lit the flame with ease, cupping his hand around it to keep the slight breeze from the opened window away. He held the flame to the end of Kellin's cigarette and carefully watched it until the tip of the filter started to burn.

"There," Alan told him quietly without making eye contact, handing Kellin the lighter back and stepping away from him.

"Thanks," Kellin said, smoke exiting his mouth as the words did, "Want one?"

"Oh, no, thank you," Alan replied shyly, shaking his head, "I don't smoke."

"Being in the same room as a smoker and inhaling the smoke is almost the same as smoking, is it not?"

Alan just shrugged in response, loosely crossing his arms over his chest and lookimg at the floor.

"Suit yourself," Kelllin sighed as he inhaled deeply, removing the cigarette from his mouth to let out a large cloud of grey. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall, biting the inside of his cheek before placing the cigarette back between his lips.

_God, this sucks._


	2. where did you want me to begin?

"Tell me about yourself, Alan," Kellin said, putting out his third cigarette on the windowsill and tossing it carelessly out the window. "I don't want a stranger in my house."

"Oh, uh," Alan stuttered, blushing at the other boy's demanding yet gentle tone, "There's not much to tell. I'm a bland person in all aspects."

Kellin rolled his eyes and plopped down onto the carpet, patting the space to the right of him. Alan cautiously took the seat, folding his legs underneath him and not making eye contact as he did so.

"Surely there's got to be _something_ interesting about you," the dark-haired boy told him, taking a look at him and quirking a brow.

Alan just shrugged and wrung his hands together in his lap. He really did believe that he had nothing worth sharing, but if Kellin wanted him to talk then he would have to find something to talk about.

"Well, um," the redhead starts, looking up at the ceiling in thought, "I play guitar and I have for a while. My best friend Austin and I are trying to start a band. I turned 16 a little over a month ago. Oh, yeah, and my initials are A.A.A."

Kellin nods, his lips curling slightly into a tiny smirk. He leans back on the palms of his hands and catches Alan's gaze. He watches in amusement as the ginger's cheeks begin to burn.

"Alright," was Kellin's only response. "Cool things. Neat things."

Alan chuckled nervously, seemingly unable to form a proper sentence. His throat had gone dry, and he fidgeted in his spot where he sat.

"What about you?" Alan asked after a few agonizing minutes of silence. "I'm sure you have better things to say about yourself."

Kellin shrugged and sighed, pulling his handy paper box of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket and plucking yet another one out. He places the tube of tobacco between his lips, but doesn't light it, just leaves it there.

"You don't need to know anything about me," he told him, the cigarette bouncing slightly with every word.

The redhead's phone chimed twice just then, making both of them nearly jump out of their skin. Kellin's cigarette tumbled from his lips and rolled onto the carpet, out of his reach. He didn't bother to chase after it, too busy focusing on the other boy's frantic movements. Alan scrambled to his knees and slid his phone out of his back pocket with trembling fingers, unlocking it quickly to read his notifications.

**Austin**   
_be at my place in 20, ashby!! got some real good stuff cooked up (no, not drugs, you crack whore)_

Alan chuckled down at the screen and typed a quick _ok ur majesty_ and hit send. When he looked back up, Kellin was eyeing him expectedly, obviously wanting details but clearly not about to actually ask for them.

"It was Austin," Alan told him and cleared his throat, "I have to go. He's working on some stuff for the band and from the sound of it, he's got something good."

Kellin only nods, keeping his gaze locked on him for a few too many seconds, as if analyzing his _soul_ , before tearing his eyes away. He stood up and brushed off the front of his pants. Standing up straight, he stretched out his limbs, and Alan cringed at the noise some of his joints made as he cracked them.

He started walking toward the door without so much as a glance at Alan. The ginger felt his cheeks begin to color again as he stood up and slowly trailed after the other boy. They made their way downstairs, and Alan jumped for the second time as Kellin's mom immediately came into view. Her hands were clasped together tightly in front of her chest and a toothy grin adorned her friendly features.

"Nice to see that you two are still alive!" She exclaimed with a warm giggle that the redhead couldn't help but smile at.

"We've literally only been upstairs for two hours, Mom," Kellin groaned and shoved past her, heading into the living room.

As Alan followed him with his eyes, he noticed that there were already picture frames hung on the walls and abstract artwork poised in surprisingly complimenting areas of the room. Once Kellin was out of sight, his attention returned to the woman blocking his path.

"Is he...alright, Mrs. Bostwick?" He asked, his brows furrowing together at the sound of something falling and a muffled shout of _Fuck!_

Her lips curled downward ever so slightly, but she quickly recovered, the bright smile returning to her face. She clearly didn't think he'd noticed, or didn't want him to, so he chose to ignore it.

"He should be fine," she spoke softly, but her grin didn't meet her eyes. "It'll be rough on him for a while. I mean, what teenager wouldn't have a hard time moving out of state _and_ dealing with his parents splitting up? I wouldn't worry about it, though. Kellin's a tough kid. Got it from his momma."

Alan laughed quietly at the joking wink she threw in at the end, but his heart lurched in sympathy for the other boy.

"So I should call you _Miss_ Bostwick, right? I'm so sorry, I didn't even think about that," he asked sincerely.

"Oh, no, honey," she laughed and waved her hand in the air, as if swatting away his words. "Call me Mary."

Alan nodded with a grin that finally matched hers. He blushed, not used to parents being this kind with him. Not even Austin's parents gave him this sort of attention. Then again, they had grown so used to him running in and out of their house for the last seven years that it probably didn't even faze them anymore.

_Oh, shit. Austin._

"It was really nice-"

"Would you like to stay for dinner, Alan? We're probably just going to run to Taco Bell. It's Kellin's favorite," she cut him off with a chuckle.

Alan smiled politely, but shook his head.

"I would love to, but I can't. I promised a friend I'd drop by to work on some things. It was really nice meeting you both, though," he told her, but he didn't know why his chest seemed to well up with disappointment that he couldn't stay longer.

Mary's smile didn't falter. "That's alright, sweetie. Maybe next time. I'd love to see you around here more often!"

"Definitely," he nodded.

He saw Kellin reappear out of the corner of his eye and looked back up, just as Mary turned to rush into the kitchen. His face was blank, but his eyes were swam with a million different emotions that Alan couldn't quite place a finger on just yet. The sight of it alone made Alan want to just yank him back up the stairs by his arm and force him to open up to him.

But he didn't. Instead, he raised his left hand in a pathetic attempt at a wave and smiled sheepishly. Kellin's face didn't change, but he nodded in recognition.

"I'll stop by tomorrow?" Alan worded the phrase as a question, not sure whether he should feel welcomed into the home just yet.

Again, Kellin only nodded.

The redhead bit his lip and shot another bashful smile at the boy, before turning to walk to the front door. After he'd set foot on the porch, he suddenly felt much calmer, and he was able to breathe normally again. He pulled his phone out of his jeans pocket and dialled Austin's number as he walked off the porch and made his way onto the sidewalk. His call was answered on the second ring.

 _"Dude, where the hell_ are _you?"_ His best friend's exhausted voice came through the speaker of the phone. Alan sighed in response and kicked a few good-sized pebbles as he walked.

"On my way, man," the ginger said, looking up only to check for cars as he crossed the street. He struggled to keep his voice loud enough for Austin to hear over the sound of the busy streets. "I've been at my neighbor's house."

 _"I didn't know you were friends with_ Gaskarth _."_

"What? I'm not. A new family just moved into that nice white house on the other side of me. They're nice. A mom and a boy about our age. He's very...interesting."

 _"Alan..."_ Austin sighed on the other side of the call. He sounded disappointed. _"I can hear it in your voice. You don't even have to say much. You_ like _him. And I don't want to sound like an overbearing mother but after what happened with-"_

"Austin," Alan interrupted sharply, dragging a hand down the right side of his face. He had to look up again, in order to cross another street. "This guy...he's just _interesting_ , alright? Nothing else. I mean, he barely told me anything about himself. How am I supposed to have feelings for someone I know nothing about, let alone _just met_?"

There was a brief moment of silence before Austin spoke again.

_"Yeah, I know. And I know you can take care of yourself and all that shit, I just... You're my best friend, Alan. I don't want to see my ginger princess hurt again."_

Alan rolled his eyes at the ridiculous nickname.

"I'll be fine, Austin. Look, I'm about ten minutes away from your house. I'll see you in a few."

_"Alright."_

Alan ended the call and pocketed his phone. He sighed loudly as he crossed yet another street, blushing as several drivers began to honk their horns at him. Whether it was because he was walking too slow or those fifty-something-year-old men just noticed how defined his calf muscles looked in the cutoffs he was wearing, he didn't know. He didn't care enough to stick around to find out, either.

 

"So, Alan seems like a nice boy, doesn't he, Kellin?"

Kellin shrugged at his mom's question and took the last small bite of a steak chalupa. After he'd swallowed the mouthful, he parted his lips to speak.

"He's alright," he mumbled. The corners of his mouth tugged down into a small frown. "Kind of obnoxious. Not in an annoying way. He's just...quiet. It's weird."

Mary laughed at his words and stood up to gather their empty wrappers and nacho containers. She walked to the kitchen to toss them into the garbage.

"Not all boys are as rowdy as Justin and Gabe, sweetie," she told him from the other room with another teasing laugh.

Kellin only sighs in response. He was honestly surprised at how at ease he felt with Alan already, after not even knowing him for twenty-four hours. Still, there was something about him that was just...off. Nothing too bad, he could tell. Alan just had this _aura_. One that made him sick to the stomach. Alan was too _quiet_. Too _shy_. Too... _sad_?

He was still trying to figure it out by the time he went to bed that night. He and his mom were in their pajamas, lying down on a small pile of blankets and pillows and covering up with a few of the extra ones. They wouldn't be getting their furniture until the moving trucks got there, so they had to improvise.

The discomfort that the hard floor gave to Kellin's back didn't faze him in the slightest. His mind was too busy reeling. His thoughts would travel from one pointless thing to the next. This happened every night, but it progressively would get worse and worse. As Mary's soft snores emitted from beside him and filled the room, he was able to think somewhat clearly.

He thought about his father. How he'd believed that their family would be together forever. How they could have been _happy_ , had it not been for his father's cheating and drinking problem.

He thought about the friends he left behind in Michigan. How he knew that Justin, Gabe and Jack would visit him whenever they got the chance, but that it wouldn't be very often at all.

He thought about everything from school to jobs to animals. How did the educational system run in New York? How was he going to pay for his insurance once he finally got a car? Did he want a pet hedgehog, and if so, would he name it Hercules or Constantine?

He thought about Alan. He thought about what kinds of things might run through his mind. What was he thinking about at that exact moment? Was he sleeping in the comfort of his own home? Did he even _have_ friends aside from this _Austin_? He sure hadn't mentioned anyone else. Should he try to be just a little nicer to the kid?

Kellin's mind was still racing as his eyes slipped shut. He was grateful when sleep finally took over and willed him into a brief state of unconsciousness.


End file.
